I was about to treat myself to a little Apple MacBook Pro to play with...they are so sexy, no? I couldn't wait to get my hands on one! When, disaster… our funky, newish, Imac developed a serious software problem. Naturally, EaZyD assumed it was my fault.
‘What did you do?’ ’We need to look at all your files and the sites you’ve visited …’ ‘We could take it to a geek to look at your....’
It had been a disappointing day and, do you know, I just flipped. I knew I was being irrationally upset but the only private bit of my life is on the Mac, including the book I have been researching and writing - that I feel really sensitive and precious about. The thought of having to trawl through all my stuff with EaZyD and/or a bunch of strangers...it felt like being asked to strip naked in a room full of people.
Everyone is in my stuff. My house is a thoroughfare. I cannot bath or have a pee without assistance; people wash my underwear and help me dress; I have to ask for everything I want…and often justify with a reason before I get the help I need. It totally sucks. I have no privacy, nothing that is mine.
Don’t get me wrong. I am appreciative and I understand life sucks…in oh, so many ways. Usually, I put up and shut up but, AAAGH!
In a smugly satisfying way, we resolved the software problem ourselves but I was, momentarily, put off my new purchase. Luckily, the moment passed and my new toy is now in residence, yay!
This whole episode made me realize that, for my own sanity, I need some privacy for me and my stuff...my books, my research, my admin, my recipes...my space…an eLle zone, free of intruders. So, I am claiming a room at the top of our house – currently a spare bedroom full of junk!
Out with the junk - in with the sofa bed, the Vitsoe shelving, soft lights, the flat screen TV… and my new toy obviously. It’s gonna be fab and all mine. A room of my own. It feels like a big decision and a good one.
|